Blow Up Barbie

When you look like a trash bag, your ass crack is fully exposed, your t-shirt is tied up, your lips are inflated beyond belief and your hair is blonder than an OC Housewife’s, you are drawing the kind of attention that is going to get you fucked and booted quick. Listen girls I know you think you look cute, but this isn’t a rap video set nor are you living at the playboy mansion. You look low rent!

So I was at this new club called The Act last night. It is such a dope spot which is why I love going there. It was a Wednesday so it being industry night there were a ton of people I know and who all know each other. Im sitting there drinking my drink  and I turn to left to see this bitch bending completely over with a good 3 inches of ass crack hanging out! Right in my fucking face. After the shock wears off and the guys around me stop laughing at the look on my face, I take stock of this chick. Head to toe this girl had issues, and I wasn’t the only one noticing. She was wearing some pink and white striped top that she had tied up in the back like she was competing in a wet t-shirt contest. She was wearing no shoes and her feet were busted and in need of a pedicure. Her hair was bleach blonde beyond belief to go with her big blown up pink glossed lips. Then there were the jeans, they weren’t the issue, she was a curvy girl with a big ass which was nice except apparently wearing pants that fit was against her policy. A good 3 inches of ass crack was out at all times. This girl clearly needed to get it together!

Here is the thing ladies, you can be sexy without letting it all hang out. When girls dress like that it says one important thing about you, you know you aren’t actually hot so you show as much skin as possible in order to make it look like you are sexy. If you were pretty you could rest on that fact and you wouldn’t need to let it all hang out in order to garner attention. I mean really, come on now! I swear I want to take girls like that shopping and show then what style looks like. Pick up a fucking magazine, know your damn body, and understand that the only time its appropriate for you took look like a hoe, is well never. Unless you are making money off your ass don’t dress like a low rent hooker.

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